Tonight is Senior Night for Lacrosse. It’s customary in high school sports to
recognize the senior’s contributions to the sports teams they have played on
over their time at the high school. As a
Mom it’s the night that I have been looking forward to, and dreading all at the
same time. It’s a moment where the 3 of
us will get to stand on the field with our son/brother and be proud of the man
and player he worked so hard to become. But
at the same time I feel like its saying goodbye, a closure of this chapter in
our sports parenting as we have known it.
In about 3 weeks he will graduate high school, 7th in his
class. I have the same feelings. He has fought hard to become who is
today. His Dad and I couldn’t be more
proud of the whirlwind we have been a part of the last 6 months (ok, 18
years). The next month will be filled
with celebrations and closures of one chapter for our son, and all of the
emotions that go with it.
In almost 3.5 months we all start a new chapter, we will be
trekking 1576.2 miles across the US to take our son to college. Yes, you read that right, over 1500
miles. Our daughter will likely follow
suit, in just 2 years. The questions we have been getting and the looks of
disbelief, shock, and fear that flash in others eyes when we talk about where
our family is headed into the next chapter has been interesting. So I figure now is as good a time as any to
answer the top questions we are getting; Are you guys ok with him going so far
away for college. Or, are you really letting them do this? The simple answer is yes, we are. And if Jacee wants to leave the state for college,
we will be okay with her leaving too.
The more complex answer is; their dreams are not our dreams
to follow. Our kid’s adult path is their own to take, not ours. What they chose to do with their adult lives
is not our choice. At the end of the day
our kids are only doing what we strived so hard to give them the wings to
do. We have to accept this because as
their parents it is what we worked hard to give them, anything less would be
selfish on our part. The most common
misconception for our family is: We are forcing them to do these things to
achieve our dreams (like many sports parents do), and that couldn’t be further
from the truth. We have never forced our
children to do something because we
wanted them to. Our children are pursuing their
own dreams, we are just attempting, best we can and know how, to provide them
both with the tools to help them follow their dreams.
From the time they were little if they wanted to try
something new, and it was within our means, we would try to find a way to make
it happen. For both kids, these
adventures have took us through many sports, drama, choir, band, scouts, traveling
the world for student leadership, etc.
From the time Shawn was 3 and wanted to try soccer, and decided right
away he didn’t like it. We moved to
T-ball next, and then came football and basketball, keeping him busy during
every season. By 8 he discovered Lacrosse
and baseball became a thing of the past.
We knew from the moment we watched him play this game that this is where
his heart was, he played with a passion that we had never seen. He took some time off from football, but soon
realized he missed it, and went back, and he played with a love for the sport,
but his drive was different. Half way
through this past football season, he decided that wanted to concentrate on
nothing but Lacrosse. It was a very
tough decision for him, leaving a sport that he loved. But he thought long and hard about it, and
his reasoning made sense to us. His dream the last 4 years was to play lacrosse
in college. And it quickly became apparent that it was the best decision for
him to make. Within a week things
starting really heating up on the
college front for him. Within the next 3
weeks he had 3 concrete college offers. Next
came big decision #2, which college to choose.
He made the decision entirely on his own, asked advice of many
people. He made the decision best for
him. We are looking forward to seeing
him grow in his education, while playing his favorite sport, and creating the
life long bonds he will have with these teammates. The past 6 months have been nothing short of
him accomplishing goals and learning that if you work hard enough, you can
achieve your dreams.
His sister went down a similar path. She started with softball (t-ball) at 4 years
old. A few years later she also started
playing basketball and then eventually she added Volleyball to the mix. Somewhere in there she also tried lacrosse,
but it had to be boy’s lacrosse, not girls.
That lasted one season when she decided that she missed Softball just
too much. This is where her heart
is. About 4 years ago it was apparent
that she was holding back her skills to the level in which we had her at. We talked to her about it, and she wanted
more challenges, so we moved her to Competitive ball. She is with a team that has an exceptional
bond. It offers her so much more than
just playing Softball. Every single one
of us have grown to love our Venom family.
She has excelled in the sport in the way we had hoped, and she is happy.
She has laser like focus on what she
wants to do and she is attempting to create her path. This
spring she has also decided to try her hand at Golf, it’s a challenge but she
loves it and is wanting to keep her option open now with it too. So while we she still have time with her, we
are doing our best to give her the tools as well. And we truly look forward to seeing where the
next two years takes her.
Life has so much to offer and life is short. There are a lot of places to explore other
than Westminster, CO, and if following their dreams takes them somewhere new,
even if it’s across the US or across the world, then so be it. Life is full of trail and errors and lessons
(good and bad) to learn, even the next chapter we are all about to head into
will have them. But you don’t know what
you are capable of achieving until you try.
I know I post a lot of positives and things about how proud
of our kids we are, sometimes I post about the challenges we encounter. But what you see is what you get,
literally. As a family, as parents, as
kids, as individuals, we have accomplished a lot, we try to remain humble, we
have failed, we have laughed, we have cried, we have gotten mad at each other,
we have celebrated, but the number one thing that hasn’t wavered in any way
shape or form is the love and support we give to each other, and that will not
change, ever, not even with 1500 miles between us.
So yes, we are okay with our son going to college where he
has chosen. It will be a transition for
us all. While we won’t necessarily be
doing as much co-authoring in this next chapter, we will most certainly still
be in it. As we hand him the pen and
start the transition of him writing his own book, we are ready with open arms,
and open minds and couldn’t be more excited to read where life takes him.
To raise a child who
is comfortable enough to leave you, means you’ve done your job. They are not ours to keep, but to teach how
to soar on their own. – Author Unknown
